Sunday, December 21, 2008

End of year Tag

I am tagged by my buddy Rajeev Patel. Though not much to write about my running for the past year but will share my other adventures.

1. What was your 2008 running highlight and running low?
As mentioned don't have any significant running accomplishments but my high for the year was Stok Kangri climb and low a DNF at Everest base camp hike due to altitude problem but it was very good learning experience and reality check for my future high altitude expeditions.

2. What race are you secretly planning on doing (or contemplating) for 2009 but haven't made it known to the public....until now.
hmm.. I don't want to do a 100M mainly due to time constraints, But secretly wish to do a probably Cascade or Headlands 100m.

3. Where would you like create and direct an ultra that (to your knowledge) none exists?
Surely there are lot of runnable sections in Ladakh and Sahyadri's in India. my dream event would be a 100mile run in the western ghats.

Another practical possibility would be a point to point 50 miler on bay ridge trail (east bay regional parks)

4. What is your "primary" race for 2009?
hmm.. I am most excited about a 1 week climbing class in Cascade mountains in Jul 2009.

5. What is the most exciting thing about your upcoming race schedule?
a new race Sonoma 50M

6. List your planned races for 2009:
Adam Blum's Fatass 26-mile run in Feb
Sonoma 50M in Mar
Miwok 100k(lottery dependent)
Ohlone 50K in May
Headlands 50M in Aug
Dick Collins 50M in October
A century ride

Tagging Padma/Kiran,
Vinod Vishwanath, Nattu Natraj, Chihping Fu, Michael Kanning

Friday, December 19, 2008

Flashback 2008: A trip to Indian himalayas

A year primarily in India away from wife, but more time with parents and extended family. A time to explore Indian himalayas, re-live culture and traditions. A year to introspect and set priorities for the future ahead.

Last year same time when it was decided I will be working in India for the good part of 2008, my adventurous spirit kicked in and started planning events to keep it satisfied. After talking to Abhijeet, my main focus for doing fast everest base camp hike. It was very good experience visiting kathmandu, lukla, namche bazaar, spending good time amongst sherpa culture. Very reqarding and humbling experience. One of the best hikes in the world.

Though I did'nt make it to EBC due to altitude sickness, I learnt lot more from that experience. Once I got back. I had the hunger to go back and do a mountain climb in Indian himalayas. coincidentally came across Stok Kangri mountain and planned a trip with sufficient time to acclimatize for a 6153 mtr mountain. with all the learnings in EBC trip, ladakh trip was perfectly executed and it was a enriching experience learning about ladakhi culture and humble way of life. I am in love with this place and people, very humble and simple minded. I hope to spend much longer time in this beautiful place. Hopefully retire out there and organize ultrartunning out there.

Apart from the above events, did some of self organized marathons and 50ks, to keep myself active.

Now I am really looking forward to 2009! Back to more ultrarunning and some climbing. I am hungry for adventure.

Sunday, June 29, 2008

A trip to heights of Ladakh

Ever since my EBC unsuccessful attempt, I keep thinking about different ways that trip could have been different. A extra day at pheriche would have made a difference. probably should have listened to the Nepali guide when he said
"I have 14 yrs of hiking experience, so would advise you to stay at pheriche for a day. while coming down from EBC you go in a single day, no problem, but be careful going up"

Well, I had my own reasons and ambitions and gut feeling, which didn't turn out be right. As Dan Sanford has said "Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want".

With that experience I cannot afford to take Altitude lightly, 14000ft is about the highest I would ever think of climbing in a single day, anything more than that would require lot more respect from my side.

Couple of weeks back when I was browsing through Bangalore Mirror, I came across a article on Stok Kangri, one of the Trekking Peaks in Leh, Ladakh. Height 6120M. That was it, it is going to be my second trip to Himalayas(also Karokoram) and a chance get over my EBC DNF. After about 2-3 weeks of researching around travel plans, acclimatization schedule, training plan, COST and other trip reports I came out with a following 13 day schedule. A raft, bike , hike and a climb Trip.

Day
End Point











Max Altitude(mtrs) Night Stay
1 Land at Leh











3505 Hotel
2 Acclimatising(visit bazaar)











3505 Hotel
3 Bike to Hemis and back











4000 Monastery/Hotel
4 2 Day hike: Leh to Rumbak











3800 Home stay
5 Rumbak to Gandala Pass to Nimo











4970 Hotel Leh
6 Leh to Stok village to Mankarmo











4500 Camp
7 Mankarmo - Base Camp(BC)











5000 Camp
8 Base-Advanced BC(Acclimatize )











5300 Camp
9 Summit day











6120 Camp
10 Extra summit day - BC











6120 Camp
11 BC-Leh











3505 Camp
12 Spare day/Raft in Indus











3505 Hotel
13 Fly back/back to work











3505 Pune


Unlike my previous trip, my main focus this time is to properly acclimatize before reaching base camp. It was interesting conversing with a Travel agent in Leh. I called up and asked about Stok Kangri, and it goes as follows:

Guide: You come over here, we will fix a trip.
Me: how long will the trip be?
Guide: You are Indian right? Then 5 days you can do it?
Me: what?? 5 days
Guide: Yes , if you were foreigner (referring to westerners) you could in 3 days.

I laughed and told him OK, will come there and decide.

Well If not for my EBC misadventure, I would have landed up in Stok Kangri ready to climb 20000ft + in 5 days round trip :). Ridiculous. Again "experience is what you get" better at EBC than at a dangerous mountain. I had considered some packaged tour options as well, but decided against it as it makes the trip too predictable and leaves little room to explore in your own terms.

The trip mainly will consist of following adventures:
1. Bike ride to Hemis and Back:
Mainly enjoying the high altitude desert and rolling hill ride to Hemis. And visit world famous gompas in the region. Gompas are mainly is a monastery, this was built in `7th century by king
Singe Namgyal.

2. Trek and Climb:
As part of acclimatization I plan to do a 2 day hike covering Hemis National park loop, passing one of high passes gond-La pass and returning back to Hotel at Leh.

With about 5 days in Leh and higher altitude, I should be in good shape to hike towards EBC which will be a total of 5 days round trip to summit of Stok Kangri. I am hoping to join some group once reach Leh.

3. Raft Indus river:
Finally if time permits, a 1 day raft trip in Indus; one of the oldest and longest rivers in the world which has seen plethora of civilizations in her lifetime. This should be a unique experience.

Now except for starting day everything else is decided :). Following sites were a great reference in planning trip so far.
http://reachladakh.com/guide_books.htm
http://www.dirttreks.com/2007/india/stok/trek.htm
http://www.cs.technion.ac.il/~gabik/Travels/IndiaNepal/Stok-Kangri-Trek.html

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Tagged: Thoughts on running

Tagged by my friend Rajeev Patel and here are some thoughts

1. How would I describe my running 10 years ago?
I hav'nt been running that long, but past 6 yrs of running has definitely been a great learning process, understanding different aspects of medium, long and ultra distances. And its amazing to see how body/mind and spirit adapts to demands of these distances. I would say I am more educated, and "going by the feel" runner than a schedule runner. But I do feel schedule does help achieve goals.

2. What is your best and worst race experience?
My best race has been Miwok 100k 2007, not particularly a great time, but after having some issues at Ruth Anderson 100k and AR 50M, I wasn't sure how I am going to feel in this race, but it worked out great, enjoying the lovely California coastline, running amidst some of my buddies. It gave me lot of confidence going into TRT 100M.

Way too cool 50k 2007 was my worst experience, the race organization was perfect, but I forgot the basics of racing ended up not enjoying this beautiful run. Definitely been a learning experience though.

3. Why do you run?
To feel alive, running is the easiest sport to bring back life and optimism into me, . A true gift for life.


4. What is the best or worst piece of advice you've been given about running?
Worst piece of advice - nothing in particular.

Best piece of advice - break into mini goals . I had read Yiannis Kouros breaking his 100M run into 25 mile segments, while training for my first marathon, and since then it has helped in almost every aspect of life.

5. Tell us something surprising about yourself that not many people would know.
The time I spend thinking about running events is more than my training time.

Tagged the following:
Rajeev Char
Peter Lubbers

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Running a 50k amidst love birds

Ruth Anderson 50k,
Lalbagh Botanical Gardens,
Bangalore, India
April 19th, 2008

Last year BAUR had posted a vacancy for RD and my friend Rajeev Patel happily stepped up to volunteered his time and energy Direct the race. I had pleasant memories of 2007 Ruth anderson 100k and instantly signed up for Ruth Anderson 2008 race as well.

But due to some life events, I had to come back to India on a short assignment in Jan 2008. Past 4 months I was thinking about the course and how to run my own race.

I had done a long run at Lalbagh Botanical Gardens one of the weekends and was happy to find a nice 5km loop, which was similar to Lake merced loop in San Francisco. RD Rajeev had agreed to consider my solo run as part of the race and sent race bib as well.

Fortunately Rashmi was in town and relied on her support towards the end. She was also keen to get some miles during weekend. As part of my training for Everest base camp hike, I had managed to get some long runs, but nowhere near my 2007 miles.

(lone crew member)

Considering the rising temperatures in Bangalore, Rashmi had suggested a earlier start and we both were off at 6:30am.

It was a pleasant warm day, sun slowly waking up and nice breeze by the lake, first loop myself and rashmi were together as she was new to park. As the day progressed the daily morning walkers increased and all were curiously looking at my "ruth anderson bib". I got into rhythm and slowly got done with loops one by one. I met rush about couple of times, she seemed to be in zone and enjoying her run.

(nice loop by the lake)

I particularly enjoyed the section by the lake and just reminded me of the beautiful california trail running.

About 2hr 30 mins into the Rush had completed her 10 mile run and myself about 13miles I was feeling just OK, I felt the fatigue of long run, I did feel lack of regular long runs. But was happy to get to get this distance. Rush had gone home and had planned to freshen up and crew for last few hours.

I was keen on getting as many miles as possible before she turns up, but day started heating up, breezy trails turned into hot pathways and walkers turned into love birds all along. There was hardly any benches left in the park with loving couples occupying every nook and corner.

I tried hard to give them privacy, but there were some embarrassing moments as well. Rush had reached home and was getting me some sugar cane juice and gels. my rate of succeed(salt tablet) consumption indicated a clear increase in heat/humidity as well. One of the person in the park advised me to do a early morning run instead, I just smiled at him.

About 4.5hrs into run Rush showed up at one of trail junctions, I was glad to get some rest and bandana. Wet bandana was a great relief. I was one loop short of marathon distance and I was looking fwd to it. Once past 42k, the rest was a formality.

It wasnt one of my best runs, But I was just happy to get another long run and race this year. I am sure the love birds were sick of seeing this crazy runner spoiling their weekend loving moments.

This encourages me to be more regular with my long runs, my conditioning is rusted, it is clearly shown in my recovery time as well. I miss all the long runs and races done during 2007, what a prolific year it was.

I have all my admiration and gratefulness to Rush, for all her support during the run. Thanks to RD Rajeev for being very accommodative. I heard the race in San Francisco has been a blast, hopefully will be part of it in 2009.

Wednesday, April 02, 2008

Trekking in Bhutan

A very good article in National Geographic Adventure magazine on Trekking the Snowman Trail.
A pricey proposition @ 200$ per day paid to Bhutan, nonetheless a interesting adventure in the Himalayan country.

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

EBC Updates

Pune
April 1st
All the updates related to the trip is complete now. The photos are posted at:
http://public.fotki.com/Rushme/hikes/ebc-hike/

I would like to thank my family and friends for their support in this adventure. Following individuals have offered lot of guidance for this trip:

Abhijit Karmarkar
: whose tips on EBC and checklist were very useful. I just blinded followed his guidelines, ofcourse except for acclimatization schedule :). (next time)

Anup Mathkar
: Very informative meeting during our hike to Sinhagad, he clarified all my last min queries.

Gautam Patil: I carried most of the stuff listed in Gautam's checklist(its not available currently). He also had some good suggestions on my ascent plan.



Days 4 - 6 (Lobuche to Lukla)

March 26th-28th, 2007

After first 3 days of constant ascent to Labuche (4930m) , I was planning on a 4th day of EBC and Kala pattar visit with a light day pack. But eventually I ran out of luck and Altitude caught up with me, I had a very bad 3 rd night with constant bought's of short breathing, by morning it was clear proceeding any further up is out of reach. Due to lack of time, I decided to turn back and the last 3 days were spent taking a different route , appreciating beauty as much as I can with AMS.














(finally a glimpse of Mt Everest from Kunde on last day)















(Beautiful village : Namche Bazaar)

Sometime I do think about how couple of days would have made all the difference, but I don't have any regrets as it was all or nothing kind of attempt so I take as it comes. I will add more updates on my day 2 and day 3 experience with all photos when I reach Pune.

Day 3 (Pheriche to Lobuche):
March 25th, 2008
Today was a new territory, beyond 14500ft was the first time I climbed higher and was quite cautious about that. After a good breakfast of Porridge and honey bread, we started out from Pheriche, feeling just OK. I had some distrubed sleep and had some problem breathing in the night, so definately a sign of lack of acclimatization.

Some of the guides strongly recommended a break at Pheriche, seeing my ascent schedule. I was totally aware of added benefit of a break, But I did not have a extra days buffered.

Also during dinner met with some Scottish hikers who in spite of a good acclimatization schedule had trouble at Gorak Shep. That was cause of concern for me, so I decided to hike to Lobuche
and see how it feels, and then continue to Gorak Shep which is 230 m higher.













(hike by the river basin: enroute to Lobuche)

We started at 7:30 am and hike was mostly by the river through the basin, criss crossing the river multiple times. It was a nice gradual hike until we reached Dukla, were we had some hot chocolate and got ready ready for a long steep climb. In all these climbs my Altimeter
watch High-gear Loft was a big help.













(Hike upto Lobuche Pass: sherpa carrying 60lbs+ load)

Once we crossed the Lobuche Pass we hiked through desert like barren land to Lobuche. We decided to take a lunch break and then continue to Gorak shep. Considering my mild headache, I decided would take it easy and sleepover at Lobuche instead and do a day hike to Kala Pathar and EBC on 4th day. (without the back pack)













(In the backdrop of Mt Pumori and others)


I just hope for another good day with a light duffel bag and gels, and hopefully will be able to see Everest tommorow.













(Sunset over Mt Nuptse 7862M)


Day 2 (Namche to Pheriche ):
March 24rd, 2008
Wow what a interesting day it was, long but very rewarding. my plan was to Hike from Namche to Pheriche, according to elevation differentials it is just a 800M climb, but I did'nt get any elevation profile of the entire Trail, that made this day quite misleading.

The destination is at 4260M(13990Ft) which is round about my known territory, so felt doable. After a heavy breakfast at Sona lodge, Namche Bazaar, myself and Lamber(porter) started out for a long day. When we started it was Overcast and entire Namche was snow covered , it was mesmerizing to just walk past the snow covered trails.














(Enroute to Namche to TengBoche)


By the time the day broke we reached Phunki, we hiked down and crossed Dodi kosi, before beginning another long climb of 500M to Tengboche. At the top we were welcomed by beautiful village of Tengboche, righly placed in the base of a bowl, surrounded by Huge mountains.














(Tengboche monastery)















(beautiful village of Tengboche)


We continued on to Debouche for a lunch break. After a sumptuous meal we carried on towards Pangboche, a quick call to my folks about my well being and we rolled again continued towards Pheriche. Most of Trail was besides Dodi kosi, we hardly saw any Trekkers beyond 1pm. mostly
we met with porters and yak-men.














(Above tree line: enroute to Pheriche)

Day 2 was quite tiring, the net elevation was more than 1200M, I did feel it was lot a day. Well its all done now.

Day 1 (Lukla to Namche Bazaar):
March 23rd, 2008

I am at Namche bazaar, Reached lukla at 8am and after some hiccups, started hike with the porter at 10:25 AM. As the plane landed on a small strip smaller than a football ground, I realized one of my dreams was coming to reality. Nice easy hike to Phakding with breath taking views of mountain and Dodi kosi river carving the valley.. several foot bridge crossing the river at high altitude gives superb views.














(Dodi kosi meandering through the valley)



Good to have some company even though we cant talk much but some company is good. After lunch at Phakding we started a long climb to Namche, the last 400 mts were relentless but fun. Felt fine so far at3440..(11200 ft) just the beginning of high altitude.













(Small little village: Namche Bazaar)

Planning to start early at 6am towards Pheriche as planned, hoping to have a fun day tomorrow as well. Looking fwd to it.

Here every thing comes a a cost , cant complain as poor Sherpa want to earn their best during the season. Next I will be able to email only day after tomorrow
cheers and regards
Anil

Kathmandu March 22 2008 6:00 PM

I am all set to start the trek tomorrow,had a pleasant flight Pune via Delhi to Kathmandu. It was great meeting my cousins and their daughter Shreya en route. As planned, I have booked my tickets to Lukla.








(Thamel: A hub for trekkers and hikers)

As soon as I finished my work at the airport,couple of guides and taxi drivers jumped to grab a pie of the trekking business. Found a semi free ride to he hotel. On the way a guide joined me as well, he told me about all the different services a guide could provide.Having a very low EQ doesn't help, and having read the low wages of porters in this area,I got brought in by the idea of having a guide. One thing he said really touched my heart he said, "you come here to enjoy the experience in the process you can help someone earn livelihood,that made sense to me.
More over I will have some company on this solo hike and would be safe in this political turmoil that this region is going through. So decided to hire a porter for the first 2 days sharing your loads equally. my plans of the trek remains unchanged though..Interesting thing to note is that the region is filled with all western hiking/climbing brands and also the "made in Nepal" version :)
I am done with all the last min packing, waiting for a dinner with a beer or wine and a good sound sleep..

Hopefully should have time to write from Namche.
Next to Luka,
Anil

All set to board
Pune 20th Mar 2008

Past couple days has been pretty hectic at work and me catching dust allergy made it tougher, luckily timely advice from my MIL put me on recovery and feeling great as of now. Started early from work and got done with packing. The BackPack seems light as of now(<25lbs), href="http://www.yak-attack.co.uk/">Yak Attack, added to my wishlist , great way to explore Annapurna circuit.


Prevention of AMS


Some useful sites with information on Altitude acclimatization, Prevention and Cure of AMS

(Courtesy amit mathkar)

http://www.princeton.edu/~oa/safety/altitude.html
http://www.traveldoctor.co.uk/altitude.htm

Diamox and Dexamethasone are my companions for this trip.


The Golden Rules

Rule 1:
If you feel unwell at altitude it is altitude illness until proven otherwise.

Rule2:
Never ascend with symptoms of AMS.

Rule 3:
If you are getting worse (or have HACE or HAPE), go down at once.

Pune

March 17th 2008

EBC week is fast approaching, friday I am heading towards Delhi enroute to Kathmandu. My training has been pretty decent, got some good long runs and a wonderful hike of Sinhagad Fort in Pune with all the gear. A separate post of the hike is much desired.

At the same time there is news of Everest closure from Nepal side(south) May 10th in the wake of Tibet protests, and also to allow chinese climbers to carry Olympic torch without disruption. So as of now hikers are allowed till base camp. keeping a keen eye on the progress in Nepal. if Tibet protests extend to Nepal area, then *may have* to cancel the trip as well. Mountain will last longer than us.

Keeping fingers crossed at the same time hoping the best for Tibet and climbers(some of them have spent their lives in preparation of Everest climb. getting canceled at the whim of Chinese government is very unfortunate).

will try to blog with progress during the hike.(Thx rush)

Sunday, March 23, 2008

Namche Bazaar

Kathmandu
March 29th, 2007

After first 3 days of constant ascent to Labuche (4930m) , I was planning on a 4th day of
EBC and Kala pattar visit with a light day pack. But eventually I ran o9ut of luck and Altitude caught up with me, I had a very bad 3 rd night with constant boughts of short breathing, by morning it was clear proceeding any further is out of reach. Due to lack of time, I decided to turn back and the last 3 days were spent taking a different route , appreciating beauty as much as
I can with AMS.

Sometime I do think about how couple of days would have made all the difference, but I don't have any regrets it was all or nothing kind of attempt so I take as it comes. I will add more updates on my day 2 and day 3 experience with all photos when I reach Pune.

Namche Bazaar
March 23rd, 2007

I am at Namche bazar, Reached lukla at 8am and after some hiccups, started hike with the porter at 10:25 AM.
As the plane landed on a small strip smaller than a football ground,I realized one of my dreams was coming to reality.
Nice easy hike to Phakding with breath taking views of mountain and Dodi kosi river carving the valley.. several foot bridge crossing the river at high altitude gives superb views.
Good to have some company even though we cant talk much but some company is good.
After lunch at Phakding we started a long climb to Namche, the last 400 mts were relentless but fun. Felt fine so far at3440..(11200 ft) just the beginning of high altitude.
Planning to start early at 6am towards Pheriche as planned, hoping to have a fun day tomorrow as well. Looking fwd to it.
Here every thing comes a a cost , cant complain as poor Sherpa want to earn their best during the season.
Next I will be able to email only day after tomorrow
cheers and regards
Anil

Saturday, March 22, 2008

And let the drums roll...

Kathmandu March 22 2008 6:00 PM

I am all set to start the trek tomorrow,had a pleasant flight Pune via Delhi to Kathmandu. It was great meeting my cousins and their daughter Shreya en route. As planned, I have booked my tickets to Lukla.

As soon as I finished my work at the airport,couple of guides and taxi drivers jumped to grab a pie of the trekking business. Found a semi free ride to he hotel. On the way a guide joined me as well, he told me about all the different services a guide could provide.Having a very low EQ doesn't help, and having read the low wages of porters in this area,I got brought in by the idea of having a guide. One thing he said really touched my heart he said, "you come here to enjoy the experience in the process you can help someone earn livelihood,that made sense to me.
More over I will have some company on this solo hike and would be safe in this political turmoil that this region is going through. So decided to hire a porter for the first 2 days sharing your loads equally. my plans of the trek remains unchanged though..Interesting thing to note is that the region is filled with all western hiking/climbing brands and also the "made in Nepal" version :)
I am done with all the last min packing, waiting for a dinner with a beer or wine and a good sound sleep..

Hopefully should have time to write from Namche.
Next to Luka,
Anil

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

Hiking through the giants.

As my plans to work in India for a extended period materialized, I started planning for outdoor activities in India, making best of the place. What better than a visit to a himalayan kingdom. To start with I had set my eyes on Everest base camp a hike from Lukla at 9500ft to Kala Pattar at 17500 ft.



















Everest base camp Trek map

Initially I had thought of attempting a single day hike from Lukla to Kala Pattar, which required mainly a day pack weighing less than 15lbs, but decided againts it keeping mainly AMS in mind as I wont be able to acclimatize even at Lukla. I was lucky to find a great checklist at Gautam Patil's website.

The trip details was elaborately shared by my friend Abhijeet Karmarkar, with detailed tips for my stay in kathmandu and in Khumbu region. Earlier I was tempted to combine my trip with a 6000mtr peak climb (Island peak or Lobuche east) as well, which would add upto 2 additional weeks,
but did'nt materialize. Peak trip is on my todo down the line.

Elevation chart of some keys villages on the way.

Destination Elevation Comments
Lukla 2840 mtr (Starting point)
Phakding 2610 mtr
Namche Bazar 3440 mtr Prominent village with internet, currency exchange and phone facility.
Tengboche 3860 mtr
Pheriche 4240 mtr (13992 ft)
Gorak Shep 5140 mtr Last village before base camp
Everest base camp 5364 mtr (17701 ft) Destination
Kala Pattar 5550 mtr

Past week I finally booked my trip dates and my trek itenary is as follows:

March 21st : Pune to Delhi

March 22nd: Delhi to Kathmandu (early morning flight)
Explore kathmandu, mainly thamel region and book my trip to lukla and back.

March 23rd: Take a early morning flight to lukla.
Start a 6-8 hrs hike to Namche Bazaar.
Distance about 14-16km
Elevation gain 600 mtr

March 24th: Start early (5am) , hike from Namche to Pheriche.
Distance about 14km-15km
Elevation gain 800 mtr

March 25th: Start early , hike from Pheriche to Gorak Shep
Distance about 11km
Elevation gain 900 mtr

March 26th: Gorak Shep to Base camp and Kala Pattar day hike
Elevation gain 500 mtr

March 27th and 28th: Hike back to Lukla

Mar 29th: Fly from lukla to kathmandu
sight-seeing at kathmandu

March 30th: Flight back to Delhi/Pune


My main training for the trip is going to be some long distance runs and couple of backpacking in Pune, I am hoping my pack to be around 22 lbs. As food and shelter will be taken care on the way in the villages, main weight is some extra layers of clothing, water and some gels. Looking forward to this trip .. waiting to see sun rise over Everest and Lhotse, and hopefully I get to climb some of those giant deities once in my life.